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It’s not that I don’t like kids. But they can be terribly annoying. Loud and hyperactive, for example. Cheeky and impertinent. Especially in public places such as stores or trains or tramways. Basically places in which you want to get from A to B the fastest possible without having your way made any longer by some yelling and jumping little scamp that most likely stinks of poop and has slaver on his shirt. As I said, it’s not that I don’t like kids. But they can be annoying to a point at which you wish to tell them that adults are taller and stronger for a reason…
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I mean I would never become violent against a kid, heaven forbid, but the other day I almost ended up yelling back at such a yelling and jumping little kind. He was in the kiosk where I was intensively scanning different magazines and was in urgent need of some quiet time. The kid was with his mom that had just refused to buy him an ice cream, which turned out to be a terrible mistake as the little rascal immediately started jumping and yelling as if he had just gotten into a training camp for fans of the World Cup in South Africa. And although I internally promised him that I would invest all my savings and bribe the FIFA so Switzerland would win (which I think was a very generous gesture considering I’m not even into soccer), he wouldn’t stop with his choruses. It took another apparent 15 minutes (in fact, it was probably not anymore than 3…) of premature World Cup celebrations until his mom finally gave in and let him grab the ice cream. Hallelujah!
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I know every kid has to go through the ice cream/mom fight. It’s probably part of our education such as brushing teeth. It helps us develop a personality, to be a man and such… I assume 3.5-year-olds have to scream explicitly for ice cream or any other imaginable candy every once in a while to train their vocal chords properly. I don’t doubt that. But is it really asked too much if I suggest these little scamps develop their vocals in the privacy of their parents’ home instead of living it out in public? I mean don’t they freaking have a sense of shame anyways?
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It was this question that made me eventually reconsider my aversion to 3.5-year-old monkeys. As much as I namely dislike their jumping and yelling in public, as much do I adore them for their capability to live exactly what they feel. How often would I want to jump and yell in stores myself to express my anger? Or how often would I like to start dancing on trains only to show how happy I am? Or sing loudly to my iPod or maybe hug a random person or cry just because I feel like it… In the end, however, it’s always my sense of shame that keeps me reserved in my expressions and all I have left to wish for is to be a little scamp myself again that jumps and yells in public and doesn’t care.
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I don’t know if the world would be a better place if we hadn’t our senses of shame, but I feel it might be more amusing. And only if it is for this fact, we should start being a little crazier about things – dance on trains, sing to iPods or scream whenever we feel like it. If my wallet turns out to contain not enough coins for this vanilla flavoured ice cream on a warm day this June, I will yell and jump as the little stinky scamp did until the lady in the kiosk gives it to me for free… Yup, I will!
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Ela wearing the Karma Pant, the academy tank, the arena vest and the kid in her… Scream for ice cream!
Photo : Timo Jarvinen